29
Jul
05

Are You Sponsored?

No.

I’m not even that good, and yet I get asked this by little kids all the time. It’s not embarassing, it’s sort of flattering, but let me tell in some more detail why I’m not sponsored, and maybe why you’re never going to be sponsored either.


1. I’m old. I’m already 30 years old, and nobody sponsors 30 year olds unless they’re amazingingly good and they’re on a team like Anti-Hero or something. Companies want kids who are 10 that are going to grow into the next big thing. Or they want the kids who are 16 and are the big thing.

2. I’m not very good. Sure, you may think I’m good because I can do a 360 flip, but that won’t get you sponsored.

3. I don’t know the right people. It’s all about who you know.

4. I don’t live in the right place. Unless you’re PJ Ladd you better move to California if you want to get sponsored by one of the bigger companies.

5. I don’t have a video camera. Sad, but true.

6. I weigh 220 lbs. You ever seen a fat, sponsored skater?

7. I only skate a few hours per week. If I wanted to get sponsored and somehow could overcome the other obstacles by travelling back in time or something, I’d still need to be skating more like 12 hours per day instead of 4-5 hours per week.

Now go skate and leave me alone. I’m just an old fat skater trying to have some fun. No autographs please.


6 Responses to “Are You Sponsored?”


  1. 1 robert Sep 5th, 2006 at 11:40 am

    Why can’t fat skaters get sponcered if they are really good

  2. 2 ian Nov 26th, 2006 at 5:38 pm

    no but i wanna be by this skateshop badly

  3. 3 keith Jul 20th, 2007 at 8:27 pm

    man i just need to get sponcored please ill do anything

  4. 4 matt Aug 12th, 2007 at 4:26 pm

    no i really want to be by enjoi because i got an enjoi board i told me friends how good enjoi boards are and they never break and all my friends are starting to get them and if i got sponsered by them i could get all the skaters i know to switch to enjoi so im gonna send them a video and hope

  5. 5 noah Feb 17th, 2008 at 10:09 am

    This guy really does suck, I’m 12 and I’ve landed a few tre flips. I can see why he can’t get sponsored. i could like kick his — in a game of skate.

  6. 6 nick Jan 12th, 2010 at 8:07 am

    Even if your fat if you skate like andrew reynolds you’ll get sponsored
    and its not about what tricks you can do
    its about your style and how creative your tricks are.
    you dont need to know the right people but yeah that would deffinately help.
    just fucking skate. if you wanna get sponsored you gotta work your fucking ass off every day, if you cant do that than just skate when you can and have fun with it, get better and feel good.
    if you arent good enough to get sponsored but you practice ery day then eventually its possible that you will be good enough.
    ~~SKATE OR DIE~~

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